Tag Archives: marriage

A little white lie is still a lie…… it hurts.

So… I screwed up. My wife and I are trying to have a baby, and I had to get some testing done at the Urologist. Now as you know, I love my wife dearly, she is my world, and I would never hurt her on purpose. Well, I f#%k#% up. I paid $250 for my initial fertility consult and couldn’t afford the lab work because it costs so much. At that moment I did not have insurance to pay for it. She asked about it and I told her they took blood when they didn’t.

This week my insurance kicks in and for my second visit all fertility lab work will be done. Hopefully they will have the results before the appointment. I have to go by and pick up a kit.

I would never cheat on my wife as I love her and the kids more than my own life. I have not been dishonest about anything and I am very proud of that fact. This tiny white lie is still a lie no less. It hurt her a lot. I know I messed up, but I did it bc I was ashamed I couldn’t afford the test until I had my insurance. This baby means so much to us both and I just wanted to do more than I could. We have been trying for a few months. My heart was in the right place but the actions were wrong. I admitted to it and accepted responsibility for it. I only hope she will see what I was trying to do.

So my point is this, no matter how insignificant it may be, or how embarrassed you might be, there is never a reason to tell the smallest of lies. Always, always be honest. Lesson learned.

As always, to my wife and kids, I love you. I made a huge error in judgement. I was an idiot, now the world knows as well. Thank you for making me better.

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Marriage

I have been on sabbatical for some time now, and I thought this would be a great way to get back into things. 2018 will be a year when I am more consistent in my writing on the blog, and I will share some of my experiences while incorporating real world issues involving conflict. Since conflict is in everything we do, this coming year will bring a wide variety of topics.

That being said…. since my last post, I got married. This is my second marriage, but we went all out, as she deserved nothing less than the best. It was a perfect day in December. We even hoped it would snow when we were planning the wedding, and sure enough, it poured Friday and Saturday. Midafternoon Saturday, the skies opened, and it was blue skies the rest of the day. It was a perfect storm of Christmas, chaos, and wedding vows. Chaos? Why chaos, it is a wedding?! Well, the photographer cancelled, the Reverend cancelled rehearsal, then wanted a room the next night, and the DJ wanted to cancel as well, all due to weather. It all fell into place. The celebration lasted for hours. Dancing, drinking, laughing, and celebrating. In the end, our friends took pictures, we have well over 700, and I married my best friend.

The ceremony was beautiful. I have never seen a woman as beautiful as she was when she came down the aisle. She melted my heart. Just when I didn’t think she could ever be more perfect, I was wrong. Standing in front of her, with family and friends watching, I couldn’t help but keep telling her just how hot she looked. Christmas tree directly in front of us, while everyone sat in a semi-circle behind us, with snow in the background on the ground and mountain tops. I was in heaven. We couldn’t have planned a better day.

I chose this topic because I was thinking about my vows. I am finally doing things in my life the right way, every day. I always strive to be better than the day before, and there is one thing I will never do, and that is fail her. She loved me enough to marry me. With that comes a huge responsibility. There are on average 800,000 divorces a year. That is astonishing. We talked about the wedding and what it meant to each of us. During our talk, I made it a point to tell her, I will not fail her or the kids. It is something I take very seriously. People are so eager to give up, and they do not fight for the things that are worth fighting for in life. They forget why they fell in love in the first place. Stef taught me the meaning of family, and the meaning of being devoted to one another for the rest of our lives. We are better together.

People can change for the greater good, as I am living proof of it. She is the single most important person in my life. I live for her, not for myself.

I now live with three women, and I deal constantly with the pre-teen drama that unfolds at the adult age of 11 and 12 years old. Yes, I said adult, because they are 11 and 12 going on 21! They know everything about everything. I must admit I love them very much, and they have shown me how to be patient, to think outside the box, be quick on my feet in my response, while trying not to laugh at the most inappropriate time. I look forward to watching them grow up and become young adults. They have softened and won the heart of this man, though I would not tell them for fear of repercussion.

In the end, marriage is great thing. I will make it my life’s work to study her, grow with her, and learn about her as we grow older. Hopefully, we will have an addition to our family soon. A classmate of mine gave me three pieces of advice for a long lasting marriage:

1.     She is always right

2.     She is always right

3.     Even when you think you are right, she is always right

 Wishing everyone a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. Be safe.

 

 

 

 


Today….

Today might be the last day you are on this earth. Make sure you tell your significant other how much you love them, appreciate them, and adore them. Look them in the eyes with love and passion, and tell them how much they mean to you. Never be afraid to share your emotions. Kiss them passionately, wrap your arms around them, and do not let go. Rekindle the relationship, and remember why you love them. The next minute, hour, or day is not promised.


Expecting Something In Return

This is an interesting article about family dynamics. Sometimes we get caught up in life and forget family is a team dynamic. You and your spouse are in a partnership. Things get done because they need to get done. Some people expect a “thank you” for their hard work around at home. In reality, it is your obligation to your spouse and family to get things done. However, a simple kind word makes you feel good, and it goes a long way. It makes you want to work harder for your spouse. I always work hard, but when she tells me how thankful she is of the things I do, it makes me feel appreciated. I know she feels the same way when the roles are reversed. However, I agree with the authors reasoning in the article to some degree. I like what he has to say about it being your job to get things done at home because you live there, but I think leading by example and teaching manners makes common sense as well. Think about it, and spark a discussion with your significant other.

https://ladiespassiton.com/2017/06/12/i-do-not-help-my-wife/


Who am I? The Man Who……

My last post was about why men should love and appreciate their other half. Today’s post is why woman should love and appreciate a good man with all their heart. Of course this is only from my perspective, but if I can paint that picture for you, then maybe you will see things from the lens of your man. I would also suggest you look at Dale Partridge posts about relationships. They will bring you closer and make you stronger. Conflict is in every aspect of life, so we have to learn to communicate in manner that is respectful and tolerant, even when we get upset. As always… to Stef.

 

Who am I?

-the man you deserve and waited your whole life to meet

-the man you have dreamed of marrying

-the man who will always treat you with respect

-the man who will always honor you

-the man who spoils you

-the man who knows your weaknesses and never takes advantage of them

-the man who knows your strengths and uses them to your advantage

-the man who will always wake up every single day and fall in love with you again

-the man that will always appreciate you

-the man who will always love you

-the man who will be good to you

-the man who will always push himself to be better than the day before for you

-the man who will not accept failure because failing you is not an option

-the man who will grow old with you and take care of you in this life and the next

-the man who cannot believe every day when he wakes up how lucky he is you are in his life

-the man who treats your heart like delicate rose pedals, providing nourishment, being very careful to never cause you harm

-the man who appreciates every hug, kiss, and word from your lips

-the man who can close his eyes, reach out and draw your face and every inch of your body

-the man who knows has something very special

-the man who will spend the rest of his life proving to you that his love will never falter

-and the man who looks into your eyes, where he sees hope, a future, and true love

 

In the end, it is all about you, my best friend, my love, and my wife.

 

 


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