Tag Archives: Christianity

Controlling Relationships more thoughts..

Stef gave me some good feedback and I want to add to it. I always asked who, what, when, where, why, and how. I didn’t realize it was breaking her down emotionally and making her a miserable person. I never knew saying don’t do this or that was so bad. Most concerns are not really concerns because they are our own insecurities. 

I love her very much, and my actions reflect those changes I promised her. She is seeing a man on a mission everyday. I am finally her rock. She can count on me to love her the right way and take care of her and the family emotionally and financially. Thank you my love.

Why Men Should Appreciate Their Other half……


You should appreciate your other half because:


-they put up with your mouth

-they take care of you when you are sick

-they are stronger than you

-if she is pregnant, she made a lung, heart, fingers, limbs…. And you…. Right, nothing!

-they cook

-they clean your clothes

-they listen to you complain when you are having a bad day.

-they are delicate inside and out, but can be as tough as barbed wire if needed.

-they keep us in line when are unable to do so

-they look more and more beautiful as each day passes

-they are understanding and compassionate

-they are kind

-they put things into perspective

-they love you even when you probably do not deserve it

-they take pride in the way they look

-they pour their heart and soul into the relationship

-they appreciate the small things

-they are nurturing

-they are passionate

-they are driven

-they are strong

This list doesn’t begin to scratch the surface as to why men should appreciate their other half, but it does show that woman are more well-rounded and mature than men. Thank you for all the hard work and dedication.



Mother’s Day Tribute

Tomorrow is a one of the most special days of the year, Mother’s Day. I would like to pay tribute to my mom and my better half.



I want to take this time to tell you how thankful I am you are my mother. You are an inspiration to me. I have always said if I could be a ¼ of the parent you have been to me, I would be a success. You worked three jobs to put me through school, you sacrificed more than any parent should have too, and you have been supportive my entire life.

You ask for nothing, expect nothing, and I often wonder why. As I have grown older what I have realized is what you have done the last 45 years wasn’t easy at all. While I have accomplished a lot of things in my life to make you proud of me, my greatest accomplishment didn’t occur until 10 plus months ago when I transformed from a boy to a man. Many people may laugh at that statement, but I never took responsibility or accountability for my actions outside of doing my job. I was selfish, and I didn’t appreciate the things in my life. YOU always stood firm in your beliefs, and you gave me words of encouragement when I was down. Though you may have judged me, you never let me know it. Instead, you helped me grow at my own pace, even though it took half a life time.

On this Mother’s Day I want you to know I love you. Thank you so much for all you have done for me my entire life. Thank you for the hard work and patience you have shown me. I know I am difficult, but I want you to know you are the best mom in the world. This day is for you and about you. I hope I have made you proud of me, and I hope you have the Happiest Mother’s Day to date.


My Beautiful Bride

Wow! You have shown me so much. This day is all about you. You continue to amaze me every day. I have grown to enjoy life because of the things you have shown me. I am so proud of you and the things you have accomplished in life. You are without a doubt the best woman this world has ever seen.

You are a survivalist in many aspects. From rich to poor and everything in between, you have made and continue to make sacrifices for the family. Your love and affection for us and life is something I could never put into words. I am the luckiest man in the world, and I never take one second, or one minute of my life with you for granted. Thank you for loving me, thank you for believing in me, thank you for your encouragement, thank you for your patience when I had none, but most importantly, thank you for all the sacrifices you have made and for showing me what life has to offer. You have shown me life is about family, and I will spend the rest of this life and the next showing you how much I love you. I will always take care of you and the kids.

You have raised the kids the best possible way you know how. I know at times you have doubts, put them aside, you are a great mother. You have went without food so they could eat, you have bought them clothes, while you get yourself nothing, and you have juggled bills, so they could have more. Sacrifice is what it’s all about. You are a shining example for other mothers around the globe. You set the standard and raise the bar. You love and cherish every ball game and car ride to school, and you make sure they are well fed and taken care of every day. It is not about money. Instead, it is about love and devotion. They will remember that longer than any vacation or shining new toy.

On this Mother’s Day… know this, I love you and everything about you. I will spend the rest of my life learning more about you and falling in love with you again and again. Take this day and relax, do nothing, and know that all your sacrifices were worth it. I love you.

In the end, Mother’s Day is a day for mothers. However, their tireless efforts continue every single day, sick or injured, they are ready for battle. No one messes with a mom because they are a bad-ass. No weapon, animal, or human will ever come between a mother and their children. Thank you for all you do every day moms, and thank you for holding your heads high, pushing forward, and proving to all of us, women are much more powerful then men will ever be. God Bless.




Yesterday showed me just how wrong I have been, when I thought I was actually right about everything. I genuinely thought in my mind I was doing everything, everyday the right way. I am faithful, loyal, committed, passionately in love with my bride, and I always do whatever I can for her in order to take the burden off her shoulders. Boy, was I wrong! Relationships take work, time, and commitment. Until you uncover the root cause of the issues you as an individual are facing, you will continue to have problems. I never thought I was the one who had problems. I just needed her to listen to my concerns. This was the wrong approach to take.


We watched Fireproof as a family. If you care at all about your marriage or your relationship, then it is a movie to watch. Moreover, there are online resources to utilize to help you in this journey. It is a very emotional process, and it makes you face tough issues, but is it the best thing out there for truly understanding how to love one another. It is for serious people who genuinely care about their significant other and their relationship. This is something you can do together, so throw your heart and soul into it, and never look back. I will always “study” her, and I will always do what I can every single day to show her how much I love her. The movie showed me that I never knew how to love myself, so how could I love her properly, if I couldn’t understand how to do so?


It is about faith and religion, and its application is geared towards whatever higher being you believe in. Additionally, I realized I cannot shoulder everything. I need guidance. While I thought I was doing everything in my power to meet her needs, I was failing in some aspects which were sensitive for us to discuss and probably the most important. Open and honest communication is necessary in any relationship, so put your pride aside, watch, actively listen, and put a plan into action together. This is a lifestyle change, not just a fix. You will see that both of you will reap the rewards by loving and growing with each other more than you ever thought possible.


As in all things I do, thank you for honey for loving me, being patient, and for all you do. This is for you and girls.

Why Does Religion Cause Conflict?

Today I thought I would discuss my thoughts about religion. This is in no way shape or form to say my views are right. I am not here to say any one person’s views are wrong, nor am I here to put down another person’s beliefs. However, I would like to cultivate a discussion, or at the very least, a different perspective. The following is based on my own experiences, so take what you want from it.

From a conflict analysis perspective, religion has been at the root of all the World Wars, conquests, and international conflicts. While religion talks about peace and harmony, it is without a doubt extremely violent. There is extremism in many forms, but religion tends to bring violence out the most. It is a strange phenomenon in my opinion because there are no concrete facts to back up the events of religion other than the various versions of the Bible or other religious books. Unlike evolution, where there is scientific facts that are undisputable, religion bases its beliefs on books, written by several men, and is it their interpretation of what God told them. I am sure there are many of you who are exploding or even yelling at my post, but before I am sentenced to a life of damnation in hell, let us explore religion from a different perspective.

What is extremism? Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary defines extremism as belief in and support for ideas that are very far from what most people consider correct or reasonable. Extremism occurs in every facet of life, not just religion. Richard Dawkins, a preeminent scientist — and the world’s most prominent atheist — asserts the irrationality of belief in God and the grievous harm religion has inflicted on society, from the Crusades to 9/11. Dawkins examines God in all his form, he is the Author of, The God Delusion, and he says, “The take-home message is that we should blame religion itself, not religious extremism – as though that were some kind of terrible perversion of real, decent religion. Voltaire got it right long ago: ‘Those who can make you believe absurdities can make you commit atrocities.’ So did Bertrand Russell: ‘Many people would sooner die than think. In fact they do.” What is the truth? No one really knows, but what can be for sure is the fact people will go to extremes to protect their religious beliefs. It is the one thing they hold dearest, and they become victims to the insanity of religious extremism.
Christianity is not that old of a religion. It is about 2000 years old, and Hinduism is the oldest at roughly 4000 years old. Just to be clear, Islam is not that old as it is roughly 600 years old being one of the youngest. The earth however is very old at roughly at 4.5 Billion years. Many people, including myself, (believe it or not), believe in Jesus Christ. However, I am a social scientist, and I like to ask questions. Since the Bible talks about Jesus, and history says Jesus existed, I guess we can all assume on some level he walked the earth. The problem with some of the facts lies in the belief these things may not have even happened. It is based on blind faith, and it is based on the fact that we want to believe a human being possessed these so called God like powers. Could it be possible Jesus was born from a virgin mother? It is highly unlikely and impossible. I guess being a scientist I will have to admit anything is possible, but from a scientific perspective you have to have a sperm fertilize the egg in order to form a zygote.

Where does God fit in?

God however is a different story. I know some will say God is the beginning and the end, the alpha and omega, but I will question this. If God speaks to men, then God was created by something or someone. While religious books say God has no form, it is the omnipresent inside of each person, and God is around us all the time, is pushes me to ask the question where did God come from? He/ she/ or it didn’t just appear. Some higher being or higher source made it. Space is infinite as far as we know, but we are learning there is a real possibility other life forms exist. We have scientifically confirmed the earth is as old as it is, so why is man and religion as young as they are? It doesn’t make sense if you look at the entire picture. Something doesn’t come from nothing. There was something that created everything. Some of you will say to me that it is not my place to question if God is real, but it is my place to blindly believe. I will say you are a hypocrite and you are probably one the reasons religion is as violent as it is…..i.e. extremism.


The following link is a chart that explores the 37 religions practiced by most people. It is interesting to note how many religions follow one another. The Koran, Bible, and other religious books all parallel one another to some degree. It is left up to each individual to interpret what they are reading. At the end of the day, it is not about how right or wrong I am or these books are in their so called religious walk of life, it is about having faith. The problem occurs when people can no longer sit down and have an open discussion without feeling like they are being attacked. I know some of you reading this have deep religious beliefs, and I am sure some of you have had God speak to you at some point. I will say if you believe in something long enough or hard enough anything is possible. The mind is a very powerful tool, and if you believe you saw a higher being, in your mind you did. I have been very close to death on a few occasions, and I can assure you no two experiences are the same.

Does religion cause violence? Yes it does. I felt like this post was important in order to see how many of you were caught of guard by my questioning of your beliefs, your spiritual course, or your God. This is why conflict exists, because people cannot talk about the sensitive topics with out taking it personally. If you feel attacked, then you will attack back. My point is this…… be open minded enough as a scholar, researcher, or religious person to simply say I don’t know what lies on the other side after death. Who knows if God really exists? Or, if anything is even in the after life. When people say I am doomed to an after life in hell, I have to laugh because who are they to judge? The last time I checked, you didn’t walk on water, have special powers, and you put your pants on one leg at a time like everyone else.

Let me be clear. I am not saying it is wrong to believe in God, and I am saying it is ok to ask questions. I have deep religious beliefs as well, but faith is all we can have because there are no true answers to religion.

Solution- be open minded and respectful to others personal views and beliefs. Just because you believe in one thing, and they believe in something else, does not mean they are wrong. Do not push your personal beliefs on others. It creates animosity and further division between people. Stay true to your morals, values, & beliefs. After all, it is your life, not someone else’s to live. Remember at the end of the day, all we can do is have faith that in the after life there is something better than the world we live in. In the mean time, live life to the fullest, love with all your heart, and treat others the way they want to be treated.

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