The way we speak to one another can easily be taken the wrong way. Issues such as our mood, demeanor, and lack of sleep, traffic, financial issues, and work can have a direct impact on someone’s perception. It is tough to go around with a smile on our face every minute of the day, and act as if we live in a utopian world. Now apply that to personal relationships, be it marriage or your significant other. Some of you must be able to read minds as well! That is right you have super powers! You are supposed to know what the other person is thinking, the kind of mood they are in, and what they want you to do all the time. Let us just call you Yoda from now on. 

My wife occasionally reminds me, it is not what you said, but how you said it” i.e. the tone I used. Communications goes both ways, and it is easy to take things out of context based on the tone. Own up to it, if you mess up, apologize and move on. Feelings can easily be hurt. Remember women’s hormones fluctuate, so be prepared for anything. Remember, they are always right! There is no exception to this rule. You have to look past some things, and pick and choose your battles.

In stressful and sensitive situations, the tone you use can have a direct effect on the outcome. Be courteous to one another, set boundaries and rules. If you feel as though things are getting out of hand, walk away, and revisit them at another time when both of you are willing to engage in a constructive conversation. 


About PhDMedic

I have a Ph.D. in Conflict Analysis & Resolution, with a concentration in International Peace and Conflict, and I am a National Registry Paramedic with 30 years in emergency services as a provider and educator. View all posts by PhDMedic

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