Relationships

Relationships have many faces. They can be fun, exciting, kind, loving, and passionate, but they can also be destructive. Lying, cheating, back stabbing, and no emotional, psychological, or physical support, can lead a relationship down a path of destruction. So when do you let go? When do you finally say, I can no longer do this because I deserve better.

 

As you know, a couple of months ago I found myself at a crossroad in my life. I could continue on the course I was on, or I could turn the corner and be all I knew I could be as a man. It was time to grow up, always do the right thing, live my life by the values my parents brought me up on, and be proud of who I am. Relationships are the same way. Give all you can each and every day. Love with all your heart, and never take the other person for granted. ALWAYS be honest no matter the pain it will cause, because lying in any form builds distrust, and it causes far more pain than just being honest. A relationship will not work if only one of you is being honest. It will not work if you are not forgiving each other for past mistakes, and it will not work if you cannot commit and understand each others needs.

 

Never leave a relationship because of another person. You decided to enter a relationship with this person for some reason. Your time is valuable and so is theirs, so make every minute worth both of your time. In the end, if it fails, you both gave it all you could, and you tried with all your heart to make it work. However, do not give up when times get tough. Nothing worth having is easy. There will be times you will not agree. Open and honest communication is the key to finding resolution in any situation and / or conflict.

 

If the person you are with is not meeting your needs, move on. Sometimes they make the decision for you based on their behavior. What I have found is that I am a fighter. We all make mistakes, but the problem arises when you do not correct the self destructive behavior. It is disrespectful to the other person in the relationship who is giving you all they have in everyway possible, yet you are unwilling to hold up your part. What makes it worse is when they look you in the eyes, and they say they understand, and yet they continue to lie. It is cowardly and unacceptable behavior. If you want to be a good person, then be one. If you want to truly change, then change. If you want someone to love you with every fiber of their being, then reciprocate that love in a manner fitting to deserve that same kind of love in return.

 

In the end, relationships only work when you both are willing to give 100 percent, 100 percent of the time. There are no breaks, no down time, and no, I just don’t feel like it today. They take work and commitment every single day. Both of you deserve reassurance from time to time, especially when you are having a tough day. The strongest relationships last because no matter the setting or the circumstance, the other person is all that matters. The selflessness of completely giving all of your self to someone, and showing them your vulnerability, is priceless. No matter who is around you or who is in a room, there is nothing more beautiful or handsome than your significant other. You find yourself falling in love with them all over again. When you ache to be with that person, no matter the circumstance, you will know without a doubt that is the person for you. This is especially true as the newness goes away, and the weeks become years. Relationships are an incredible thing, enjoy the journey and the process, just be respectful, open, and honest about your feelings.

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About PhDMedic

I have a Ph.D. in Conflict Analysis & Resolution, with a concentration in International Peace and Conflict, and I am a National Registry Paramedic with 28 years in emergency services. View all posts by PhDMedic

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